Fibber Magees

It’s very rarely that a city like Dubai can take you by surprise… Well after an afterthought and a blink of an eye, I stand corrected. It does surprise me how a road that used to turn right, now turns left without as much as a hint of a warning, how speeding and flashing lights to get out of the way are as normal as downing a shawarma with a little bit of tahini sauce and screaming for more pickles, or how you can have one of the city’s oldest bars tucked away in the heart of a construction war zone and still be standing tall among all the skyscrapers around it. Ladies and gentlemen…it’s time you said hello to Fibber Magees.

Well going by its name and the colours associated with it, definitely Irish and from its website (yes it has a website of its own but unfortunately does not give much about its history), we learn that the place reopened in 2004. Why did it shut earlier or is it really one of the oldest bars in town as most people claim calls for a lot more than investigation. It calls for beers at the fibbers.

So donning by detective hat and sporting my imaginary magnifying glass, we ventured out on a Wednesday night to find answers to questions that were left unanswered and very seriously causing an uncomfortable dry lump in the throat. So as responsible residents of the city (a very rare kind) we jumped into a cab and headed to discover the unknown. Now I did happen to ask an ex sometime back as to how to get to this place. She seemed a frequent drinker and a quizzer there. Well all she said then was that I would not be able to find the place. Well me being also smart (another rare kind) knew when I was not wanted and realized that there will be a time and a place…Well not exactly what you guys are thinking, this story of mine has a happy ending, there will be a time and a place to find the Fibbers and down the lagers…

Anyways snapping out of the unnecessary flashback, which I may delete at the end of this write, lets get back to the story. So in the cab zipping on what has been labeled the deadliest road in the world, we really didn’t need to have one of the most friendliest drivers in the world, who thought it absolutely fine to look at me, leave the steering, and share a laugh with me and Cyril over some inane joke on something I don’t remember right now (yes the alcohol seems to be taking away those brain cells, but no complains there as it makes us forget easily things that are really worth mentioning) all at the same time while speeding at over 100km/h and changing lanes. Trust me like Cyril says, it’s probably safer to drink and drive these days.

So after missing a few exits, going down the wrong alley and asking about two and a half people for directions, we realize we were just five minutes away from uncovering for us one of Dubai’s oldest and maybe even one of the few well kept open secrets of the city. Now for all of you who do decide to go there, this is how you get there. So you are headed to Jebel Ali from Dubai on Sheikh Zayed Road. As you come out of the Trade Centre roundabout, there is an immediate exit for a service lane taking you to the Fairmont Hotel. The service road runs all the way after the Fairmont Hotel to the Crowne Plaza Hotel. So drive past the Fairmont, look out for the KFC, after which you will come across an Indian restaurant by the name Jashn. This is where you get out of your car and walk into the adjacent alley. Not much of very exciting entry, but take a few steps down and turn left, there is one lantern that should and will catch your eye. By the lantern don’t miss the wooden board, which basically was the Big X for us that marked the spot. Incase this description causes any problem in making you get the directions right. Just jump on their website (www.fibbersdubai.com) for a look at the map.

Now if you are a fan of football, the beautiful game, and a fan of London club Chelsea, then there is no better place for you to be. It so seems that the Dubai chapter of the Chelsea fan club, have made Fibbers their home for the moment. All matches that Chelsea play are without a doubt on the big screen, be it the Premier League, the Champions League, the FA Cup and the Carling Cup…No better place to see the elephant strong Drogba stumble to the ground and wince around in pain after being brushed by a hair, or JT show people around what it is to don the Blue.

As it happens this night was Champions League night, Chelsea playing Apoel from Cyprus, so was a good night to get a good feel of the place. So as we walked in, first impressions were smoky, beer, drunk women and some awesome gigantically sized burgers…now that’s the way we like it. Not able to find ourselves a table, and seemingly a bit lost, we suddenly heard a voice over my shoulder. Not sounding like God for sure, and looking heavenwards (we were one of the shortest people in the bar, even the women seemed taller, wonder if it was the beer…good stuff I must say…). Tall white man ask, “you Juny (or something like that)…I say no…he say, “I’m sorry, I think you Juny (or something like that). I wait for coloured man, if you see another one of your kind, who look lost, please send my table.” Well not much happened after that conversation other than us taking the white mans table after he had waited long enough for Juny (or something like that).

So seated at the table and watching at least three live games at the same time, certainly seemed like a good start. We were later to be joined by none other than Dom, Kingsley and his wife Scarlett. Yes people we finally do have our first official woman beer drinker on Discover a Bar on Wednesday (DABOW). A big first in my campaign to let and help people attain beervana…To celebrate this great occasion we managed to get a few of our pics clicked and Scarlett drank straight out of the pitcher. Not much conversation this time round as people were engrossed in the game, except for this one man. It was an encounter of the racist kind (a very common kind here) who for some reason believed that you could support a team only if you were from that country. His nationalistic approach and narrow minded thinking got me a bit wound up, but Cyril immediately got the pitcher in front of me and hypnotically I seemed to forget. This time round thankfully it wasn’t the brain cells going blaaah…well it saved me the effort of clenching my fist and not holding a glass. But other than that Dom very carefully continued sipping away on his Carlsberg and Cyril watched the game. On the other hand Kingsley worried about when he would get back home so that he could catch up on his mandatory 8-hour sleep. Shetty refused to come out because he needs to study and get to work the next day. I ask you what is happening to the 25 year olds these days. The adventurous, the enigmatic, the dynamic, the plain stupid and drunk, they are a diminishing kind. Dubai is making these people stare at mid life crises a little too early, don’t you think…

The menu does seem diverse but it does end up being pub grub again…all fried and crispy most of the time. Do check out the offers on though, they do seem to work out more reasonable. Especially the lunch offers are worth a try if you can sneak up to there during a workday. Be ready to down a pint as well when you are down there. According to their website they do seem to have a lot of catering going on as well, so maybe somebody could give them a try and let me know what they think of their services. Prices on the menu not a poor mans price, but it can be done once a week. Check out some of the other activities they have happening there as well. Believe they have a comedy night.

Now most reviews on the net do not really give it too much credit on its interiors. But according to me its one of those bars that don’t really have too much pretense going on, and the décor of the place very intelligently maintained giving the bar a great ambience which makes you just want to revel and drown the night away in your beer. The crowd on the night was mostly football fans, who quickly disperse once the games were over. But I do believe that there are a few regulars over there and plus I like mentioned earlier the quiz nights are certainly a big draw. In addition to it being close to quarters of air hostesses, they do sure seem to make an entry there, thus leading to more footfalls of pot bellied fifty plus men. And that certainly does not make for bad business.

Bad business is not what we gave them either. Another review calls the place a workman like bar, but the prices of the beer or the food are definitely not workman at all. Pretty much the average cost of a beer in Dubai. This is the city that probably serves the most expensive beer in the world. Can you beat the fact that a mug of beer in this city costs close to $10. Don’t know if that’s workmanlike at all. Certainly does not work for me, but you cant really help it. There are some things that just have to be done no matter the cost or the consequence. Like me writing this blog and putting people through the torture of listening to my rants.

The evening on the whole was definitely a good one, with Chelsea winning in Cyprus, us discovering a bar, Kingsley probably going late to work the next day and Shetty continuing to fool himself that he is studying at home while watching Hindi reality TV at home. By all means a place to visit for one and all when in Dubai. Just make sure to get there early and be equipped with your best humour for a hearty laugh and probably some not so smart quips from the uninformed…I’m sure the best of us will be able to handle it. Not fibbing at all…